The Ancient Ibicenco Fighting Art of Search Engine Optimisation

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Ibiza SEO Sitrep

Ok lads quick update on the Ibiza SEO mission.

Those of you who were awake at the last briefing will remember that the only person who's ever come to the site using the words that way round was our "Ibiza SEO wannabe? (see post below if you're worried about booby-trapped links)

Well oddly enough :) the very next day after we pointed this out *someone else* hit the site "from the UK" using that very term.. just how unlikely is that, 3 years nothing, then 2 in 2 days? ..someone else using IE8 at 1920 x 1200 resolution? :)

Er.. yea, alright Numpty, because no-one knows what a VPN is round here do they? - or even which one you're using (Hidemyass? :) Whilst nosing around Spec Ops he noticed the satellite imagery of his previous surveillance (2mins 2 secs here below)

He even had a read of "The Art of SERP War" while he was there, but he obviously didn't learn much, or understand that it's not just an IP address that can gives your footprint away, because a quick switch to Amsterdam on the VPN..

and continued nosing around blissfully unaware he'd been pinged and was being observed through the cross-hairs the whole way..

Now any proper SEO troops know it's better to have your opposition underestimate you than the other way around, if only to see the looks on their faces when you boot their kitchen doors in and escort their ladies off for "de-briefing" (SEO Services Ibiza -if you get my drift ;)

However in this instance this operative is showing such low levels of awareness there is a strong possibility any actual SERP contact is likely to resemble 42 Commando RM vs Argie Conscripts 1982..

The combination of superior seo training, extensive serp combat experience, advanced weaponry (including surveillance equipment) is likely to make victory quickly decisive.

It's not bragging, but it's just not reasonable to expect a "bedroom seo" who by one means or another "inherited" control of a site that wasnt built by and didn't belong to him, and has never strayed out of the safety of little "Ibiza" searches, to have any hope against hardened shock troops with global combat experience in some of the toughest SERPs on earth.

However Lads, the Rules of Engagement are to be strictly followed, business is business and we must act in accordance of the rules, however if he makes it personal.. :)

Well thats a whole other can of worms isn't it? :)

SEO Ibiza - as you were..

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Ibiza SEO

Right listen up.

You'll be glad to know the SEO Scotland situation has resolved itself with minimal haggis spilt, but we have orders to mobilise immediately to deal with some homegrown insurgency.

Intel have been observing some "interesting" action around Ibiza SEO see below..

Ibiza SEO

This is clearly not a very advanced adversary as he seems to think IE is an appropriate browser for the job :) ..alright, stop your sniggering..

Ha ha, yes yes, he probably does code in asp and host on Windows too, but he seems to be trying to pick up intel of his own, it looks like he's trying to work out how to build a half decent WP SEO blog (WMDs) for a disgruntled customer or something so we have to engage.

The fact he always lands on the site following "Ibiza SEO" leads us to believe he is targeting it, which is funny as in all the years HQ have been #1 for "SEO Ibiza" & "Ibiza SEO", he's the only one who's ever searched it that way round..

He's probably got it that way round in his site's competing page title too, profiling suggests this character is likely to try mis-spellings of things and shortcuts to give himself more of a chance..

Anyway I won't bore you with any more details, you know what to do.

SEO Services Ibiza Over & Out.

Monday, July 5, 2010

Funny Business SEO & Scotland ?

Ok lads listen up.

We knew it was going to happen at some point, that we might be asked to turn the firepower inwards on our own people, and well it's not quite our own but Scotland, they do at least they speak something similar to English so it might be a little uncomfortable for some of you, but you know what you have to do.

Apparently someone, lets call him "SEO Scotland" has been a bit lippy to HQ on some forum at the weekend because they had their boots in his cornflakes again (note to selves - work on social skills more) and he has decided he's going to come and outrank them for "Business SEO" using his HubPower and copywriting skills alone :)
Yes yes, come on it's not that funny..
Have you quite finished? Ok so it's vaguely possible he might be seen bumping around briefly on page 2 or 3 in a few weeks, orders are to terminate on sight.

Recon (allintitle:) shows that he did manage a #2 for a 5k allintitle kw..

Lads! Will you stop laughing this is serious!! :) ..ok, look I know, I know, but lets get the briefing done and we can get back to real work ok?
Scottish Business SEO
"Business SEO" is about 86k allintitle: so we think that clearly chappie is going to have to up his copywriting rate, but he seems serious and so must be dealt with as a threat accordingly.

This is the best picture we have of him but obviously his appearance may have changed since then. There are rumours of him wearing those big fluffy pikey jumpers they have up there, and obviously he'll probably have beer stains on it when you see him.

Ok you know the score, get on the case.

Wait up lads
! - before you go news just coming in, recce team got it wrong you slackers, the original target was a decoy, repeat decoy.

This guy was smart enough to trick you lot and so has likely has SEO WMDs and so must be dealt with accordingly.

Ok get to it, over and out.

edit, since this post has been getting Scottish traffic if you're looking for a proper SEO in Scotland <<--follow this link

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